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Smoking
Tony: Do you smoke? I’ve never known that. When did you start smoking?
Jane: I started smoking when I was eighteen.
Tony: So, how long have you been a smoker?
Jane: I have smoked for twenty years.
Tony: How many cigarettes do you smoke a day?
Jane: I smoke two packs of cigarettes a day.
Tony: Have you ever tried to quit?
Jane: Yes, I have quit twice: once when I was expecting my baby, Paul, and the other time when I had a bad sore throat. But I had a hard time.
Tony: If you knew what it was doing to your lungs, you would think twice about it!
A Death
Martha: Did you hear about the Smith family?
Charles: No, what happened?
Martha: Mrs. Smith passed away this morning.
Charles: That’s a shame. What from?
Martha: Heart attack, I think.
Charles: That’s a terrible thing.
Martha: Yes. Mrs Smith went into hospital last night by ambulance and died this morning.
Charles: Had she been suffering from heart disease?
Martha: Yeah. Mrs Smith had it for five years before she died.
Charles: Did they try surgery?
Martha: She had two operations, but they weren’t effective.
Charles: I feel sorry for Mr. Smith.
A Birth
Martha: Have you heard about the good news in the Wallace family?
Charles: No, I’ve been out of town.
Martha: Mrs Wallace went into the hospital last night and gave birth to a baby girl seven hours later.
Charles: That’s very good. But they already have a little girl, don’t they?
Martha: No, they have a five-year-old boy.
Charles: So they wanted a girl this time, right?
Martha: Yes, they wanted a girl for a long time.
Charles: Was it natural childbirth?
Martha: No, she had to have a caesarean.
A Coincidence
Timothy: Teresa! What a surprise! What are you doing here?
Teresa: Timothy! I don’t believe it! I’m going to see my daughter. She will marry this weekend. How about you?
Timothy: I’m going to visit my parents. When is your daughter’s wedding?
Teresa: Sunday.
Timothy: Wow! This Sunday is the 45th wedding anniversary of their wedding, too.
Teresa: This is a surprise! Anyway, where is your train leaving from?
Timothy: My train leaves from Platform 3, over there.
Teresa: How long will you…
Announcer: Now leaving from Platform 3, train for Vancouver.
Timothy: That’s my train. I have to run. Sorry we didn’t have more time to talk.
Teresa: That’s OK. I’ll see you when you get back. Have a good time, and say congratulations to your parents!
How have you been?
Grace: Raymond!
Raymond: Oh, hi, Grace! How have you been?
Grace: Good! I hear you have been to Toronto for a few days.
Raymond: Yes. I just got back yesterday.
Grace: Did you have a nice visit?
Raymond: Really nice. It was very good going around downtown and shopping. And I saw the Toronto Blue Jays game at Skydome. It seems that Toronto is a very exciting city.
My brother Stanley was there, too. You’ve met Stanley, haven’t you?
Grace: Sure. I met him when he was here in Hamilton last year. What’s he doing these days? Still teaching baseball?
Raymond: Yes, as matter of fact, he just began to teach elementary school.
Grace: Great. How’s everything with his kids?
Raymond: Have you met my nieces?
Grace: Yes, they visited you once in the summer, didn’t they?
Raymond: Right. They’re both fine.
Grace: I haven’t seen them in a long time. They must be really big.
Raymond: Well, they will come over this Christmas. Let’s have a great Christmas party together.
Grace: That’s a good idea.
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